Self Acceptance or Self Improvement?

It’s such a precarious balance to find.

I’m regularly reminded by my yoga students of the longing in each of us to be loved and accepted for exactly who we are right now and the importance of loving and accepting ourselves for who we are right now.  I know that trying to change and improve ourselves from a place of lack and unworthiness is futile and will never stick.

And yet as human beings we are designed to evolve…
We all get deep satisfaction from the feeling of growth that we get when we are stretching and extending ourselves beyond what might feel familiar or comfortable.

So when we think about “the holiday season” whatever that may look like for you, what do you see in your mind’s eye? A lot of people know that they will be in places or situations that they don’t want to be in. They don’t actually want to be there at all, but a deep rooted social obligation pulls them to do it – whether that is right or wrong is a topic for another day and will definitely be bespoke to each of you.

You might think, I’m NOT going to react to uncle Joe’s annoying comments OR I’m not going to react to the pressure to host – I don’t want to host! OR I will spend more time for myself this year – I will! OR I won’t be the only one on the team to work over Christmas again, ffs.

These kinds of thoughts are our inner wisdom breaking through. Telling us that we can meet both the deep rooted knowledge that we do want to see our family and friends and yet we do NOT have to be pushed into doing things or even talking about things we don’t want to do or talk about. Our inner wisdom telling us what OUR balanced life looks like!

These thoughts are YOU EVOLVING! In yoga the first step is ALWAYS to observe – to become aware – without judgment. Once you are aware, true growth and change can happen.

For my clients we have four steps to growth –
1. Discovering your trigger (uncle joe’s annoying comments?)
2. Discover what you do want and how that ties directly with your personal values and beliefs
3. Work through an EMPOWER formula to make sure you have the tools and motivation you need to support this change
4. Create a success strategy to hold on to this change and set you up for long term success!

This step by step process, along with being held accountable, and having someone to talk to – who is completely impartial – can be a fantastic process for true life changing growth in a short amount of time.

Sure, a part of you knows that you could do a lot of inner work by yourself in your own time, but weekly calls with me hold you to account. Did you actually DO the journal questions exercise? And now that you did, can you put it into words enough to tell me about it?

Along the way we work with the physical connection to the mental.
For example “Detoxing” – ultra processed foods are addictive and have ‘hangover’ like symptoms in the body when we eat them. Ever heard of Sick House Syndrome? It causes migraines. Have you used Aromatherapy before? Did you know it can help with IBS pain and headaches? (There is science behind all of the supports we use.)

Every coaching journey is bespoke to each client.

So what’s stopping you from taking the leap? I genuinely want to know!
Is it one of these?

 I don’t need to change, I’m happy as I am

 I don’t feel the financial investment is something I can afford right now

 I’m not sure, now that I’m trying to put it into words

 I don’t have enough time / energy / something else

Get in touch and let me know.

Warm wishes and big hugs this ‘Holiday Season’,

Kayla